Underestimation IS key!

"I've always wondered why me? What was it about me to make people brush me off or disregard my entire being? I have always viewed myself in the brightest light because I truly know who I am and what I am capable of. What bothered me is that the next person didn't see what I saw..."

Finally taking action to follow your dreams is a very big step in life. You will soon notice that everyone will not believe in you and your abilities. In fact, many people will doubt your ability to excel in life. I don't necessarily know the reasoning behind this, but I'm sure there are more reasons than one. We all view ourselves in the brightest lights and it only takes one person who doubts us to ruin a portion of our self-esteem. In the past, I found it hard to relate when someone would tell me not to worry about what others thought of me. In moments of being underestimated, that is your only concern; what others think of you! I have tried to figure out why others don't see in me,what I see in myself. It was quite exhausting and hurtful even, but as time went on I've learned to stumble but never fall. Words can hurt sometimes but always pick yourself up!

 It's not you; It's them.The most important lesson to learn is that not everyone will see your potential. Expecting someone to see your potential can hurt you in the long run because you shouldn't expect anything from anyone! I'm a firm believer in just letting your work speak for itself. At times, people underestimate you simply because you don't meet their expectations. The most beautiful thing about life is expecting the unexpected. Some people have this image of what a talented or successful person looks and acts like- and you don't quite fit that image to them. You may believe that's your problem but it isn't- It's their problem! Successful people come in many different forms! Being yourself plays the biggest part in anyone's success so if we all looked and acted the same then individuality would no longer exist! 


Prove them wrong. There comes a point in life where you have to let those who doubt you continue to do so and just prove them wrong. Earlier, I said I couldn't relate to those who say  'don't worry about what others think' but now I can because I know the truth. We go through many different stages in life and I realize I wasn't in the stage that I am in now. You can't spend too much time caring about what someone says about you because if you do, you will have no time to focus on and accomplish your dreams! The truth of the matter is, people are always going to talk! I'm no stranger to being underestimated,and it honestly damaged my self-confidence. Now, it just activates my drive! When you truly know your destiny, nothing can stand in your way. It doesn't matter what others see in you, it's all about what you see in yourself; You control your own destiny! 

So why hasn't being underestimated stopped me from following my dreams? Simple. I've made it this far for a reason! My dreams matter to me so I...

Hoodie By: Maxxnn & Kooln Outfitters, LLC

"Change is inevitable..."

Photo Taken by: Lauren Beard (Facebook: Lannette Photography)

 Since a new year is approaching, I have taken the time to really self-reflect. As any other year, 2016 was definitely full of ups and downs. This year wasn't always so positive, after all, this year I have encountered some really negative situations. But after having some time to myself to think, I have turned those negative situations into positive life lessons ( or inspiration if you may). In doing so, I have come up with some goals, and these goals are not just for 2017. These are goals that I want in incorporate into my everyday life to help me achieve my goal of becoming a better person.

#1: Be more positive!
- You can never go wrong by being MORE positive which is why this is number one for me. I am the type of person to plan things in advance so that they go smoothly- but in life, things don't always go as planned and that is when I stress myself out.  I have noticed that whenever I am in a stressful situation, I tend to freak out and think and speak negatively. In the future, I would really like to work on thinking more positively and speaking positivity into existence. When it comes to things not going my way, I would really love to be more receptive to it. I have to keep in mind that life is all about balance and stress KILLS!

#2: Never sell myself short!
- It's pretty much self-explanatory, I sell myself short. I lower my services all in efforts to not come off as rude. In the future, I would love to just stop doing that all around. I've come to learn that there is nothing wrong with charging for any service that you provide and you charging for your services doesn't make you a bad, mean, or rude person!

#3: Articulate myself better
- I am the first to admit that I am socially awkward so socializing with others was something I was never 'good' at. In result, whenever I am talking with someone who doesn't know me well, I could come off a certain way. I could come off as sassy, aggressive, anti-social, sarcastic, etc. and in reality, that was never my intention. Now, being socially awkward will never change for me and I don't want to change simply because that is who I am. But in the future, I would like to be better at letting that be known to others. 

#4: "No."
- For some reason, I have come to believe that saying no is wrong. I am the type of person who is always putting someone else's needs and wants above my own. I need to learn that I am not obligated to always go out my way and do something EVEN when I don't. It is definitely okay for me to say no and doing so doesn't make me a bad person!

#5- Be more independent!!
- I would like to be able to show more of my creative side and do my own thing! I no longer want to work towards someone else's dream; I want to focus on my own. I want to be able to create my own opportunities and be my own brand- and I don't care how long it takes! 

I am looking forward to the new year simply because I look forward to life as a whole. I am prepared for the good and the bad. I know that each day will teach me a new lesson and as long as I am learning, I am growing! I want to hear from you all, what are your goals for 2017?

Let's Talk Natural Hair: My Top 5 Tips On Retaining Length!

 Many have wondered what I do to my hair to make it grow and there are some things I want to clear up.  As long as you have healthy hair follicles, your hair is always growing, but the question is are you retaining the length? Many people think that their hair isn't growing but in reality, their hair is growing it's just breaking off at the same time. The major key is very simple, love your hair and your hair will love you back! 

Tip 1: Clean Scalp!
Who said that dirt grows your hair again? Growing up, I have heard many myths and dirt growing your hair is definitely one of them! In order to retain length, I make sure my scalp is squeaky clean because a clean scalp encourages healthy hair growth. Plus, who doesn't like their hair to smell good?

Tip 2: NO HEAT!!
When first going natural, I loved the idea of straightening my hair to see how long it was- I was curious. Like the saying goes, curiosity killed the cat but in this case, curiosity killed my hair. I straightened my hair for my one year anniversary and I quickly learned what heat damage was. My curls were loosened and damaged; cutting away the damage is the only way to get rid of it. So, I cut my heat damaged hair and since then I have not used heat ever again!

Tip 3: Deep condition, deep condition, DEEP CONDITION!!
 Curly hair is naturally dry and needs moisture in order to thrive! So I make sure to deep condition my hair every time I wash it. Deep conditioning not only aids in adding moisture to my hair but it also helps in adding the nutrients my hair needs so that it is shiny and stronger than ever!

Tip 4: Avoid tension hairstyles!
In the beginning of my hair journey, I wore all types of extension hairstyles; box braids, Senegalese twists, sew-ins- you name it! In result of me wearing those styles, my hairline began to recede. I became familiar with traction alopecia very quickly. The hair around my hairline began to grow back once I stopped putting tension on my hair. 

Tip 5: Low manipulative styles are KEY!
Say what you want, but I like to keep things simple by letting my hair do what it wants! It's a reason why my go-to style is the twist-out. The twist-out is a very simple style and it lasts for awhile so that I don't have to constantly have my hands in my hair! When my twist-out style gets old, I just throw my hair up in a puff and I'm good to go! I will say it again, low manipulation is key!!

I hope these tips were helpful to those who are considering going natural, new to being natural, or those who are already natural. We can all learn things from each other, so what are your natural hair tips? Feel free to comment below, share, and also follow my blog  if these tips were helpful to you or may be helpful to someone you know! Until next time! -Keke

Undefined

There will come a time in life where you are constantly labeled and placed in boxes without your approval. Being labeled has simply become a way of life, unfortunately. People love to come up with their own ideas of how one should speak, dress, act, etc. in order to be ‘perfect’. We are simply living in an unrealistic illusion where every being on this earth is not perfect yet some love to take it upon themselves to teach you how to be perfect? Constantly being told you have to change the things that make you who you are is just a bit overwhelming- okay not a bit overwhelming, very overwhelming!

 Change is inevitable but it has to come naturally. No one can teach you how to change yourself, only you can! You have to take time out for yourself and decide on what you feel needs to be changed from within. From my experience, changing for others instead of yourself has never been beneficial in any way. Often times, people will tell you to change things about yourself to benefit them while passing it off as if they are looking out for you! I have personally vowed to never change for anybody other than myself because of that reason but that’s not the only reason. Another reason is because I simply wasn’t happy about it. I felt as if I wasn’t able to truly be myself; I was being something I was not. 

Honestly, you will learn in this game of life, there is only a small percentage of people who truly have your best interest at heart. Another thing you will learn is that the only person who would truly look out for you through thick and thin is YOURSELF! I refused to be labeled by other’s standards and in the process I not only learned to accept myself but I was also inspired to make a movement for myself as well. A movement in which I identify myself as being undefined. I no longer live by other’s standards and I no longer entertain anyone else’s opinion on me and the things that I do unless I feel it is beneficial for me. Self-reflection has taught me to love myself unconditionally no matter what! 

Photographer: William Britton

Most importantly, self-reflection has taught me that I am NOT perfect and like everyone else, I am a work in progress. Finally putting your foot down and not submitting to being what society wants or feels you should be is a BIG step. You will most likely be misunderstood and even hated but if by me staying true to myself is what will trigger hate in others, who needs the love? All in all, it is up to the individual to figure out if being free from society’s standards is worth it to themselves or not. Will you lose yourself or will you be undefined?