"Change is inevitable..."

Photo Taken by: Lauren Beard (Facebook: Lannette Photography)

 Since a new year is approaching, I have taken the time to really self-reflect. As any other year, 2016 was definitely full of ups and downs. This year wasn't always so positive, after all, this year I have encountered some really negative situations. But after having some time to myself to think, I have turned those negative situations into positive life lessons ( or inspiration if you may). In doing so, I have come up with some goals, and these goals are not just for 2017. These are goals that I want in incorporate into my everyday life to help me achieve my goal of becoming a better person.

#1: Be more positive!
- You can never go wrong by being MORE positive which is why this is number one for me. I am the type of person to plan things in advance so that they go smoothly- but in life, things don't always go as planned and that is when I stress myself out.  I have noticed that whenever I am in a stressful situation, I tend to freak out and think and speak negatively. In the future, I would really like to work on thinking more positively and speaking positivity into existence. When it comes to things not going my way, I would really love to be more receptive to it. I have to keep in mind that life is all about balance and stress KILLS!

#2: Never sell myself short!
- It's pretty much self-explanatory, I sell myself short. I lower my services all in efforts to not come off as rude. In the future, I would love to just stop doing that all around. I've come to learn that there is nothing wrong with charging for any service that you provide and you charging for your services doesn't make you a bad, mean, or rude person!

#3: Articulate myself better
- I am the first to admit that I am socially awkward so socializing with others was something I was never 'good' at. In result, whenever I am talking with someone who doesn't know me well, I could come off a certain way. I could come off as sassy, aggressive, anti-social, sarcastic, etc. and in reality, that was never my intention. Now, being socially awkward will never change for me and I don't want to change simply because that is who I am. But in the future, I would like to be better at letting that be known to others. 

#4: "No."
- For some reason, I have come to believe that saying no is wrong. I am the type of person who is always putting someone else's needs and wants above my own. I need to learn that I am not obligated to always go out my way and do something EVEN when I don't. It is definitely okay for me to say no and doing so doesn't make me a bad person!

#5- Be more independent!!
- I would like to be able to show more of my creative side and do my own thing! I no longer want to work towards someone else's dream; I want to focus on my own. I want to be able to create my own opportunities and be my own brand- and I don't care how long it takes! 

I am looking forward to the new year simply because I look forward to life as a whole. I am prepared for the good and the bad. I know that each day will teach me a new lesson and as long as I am learning, I am growing! I want to hear from you all, what are your goals for 2017?

Undefined

There will come a time in life where you are constantly labeled and placed in boxes without your approval. Being labeled has simply become a way of life, unfortunately. People love to come up with their own ideas of how one should speak, dress, act, etc. in order to be ‘perfect’. We are simply living in an unrealistic illusion where every being on this earth is not perfect yet some love to take it upon themselves to teach you how to be perfect? Constantly being told you have to change the things that make you who you are is just a bit overwhelming- okay not a bit overwhelming, very overwhelming!

 Change is inevitable but it has to come naturally. No one can teach you how to change yourself, only you can! You have to take time out for yourself and decide on what you feel needs to be changed from within. From my experience, changing for others instead of yourself has never been beneficial in any way. Often times, people will tell you to change things about yourself to benefit them while passing it off as if they are looking out for you! I have personally vowed to never change for anybody other than myself because of that reason but that’s not the only reason. Another reason is because I simply wasn’t happy about it. I felt as if I wasn’t able to truly be myself; I was being something I was not. 

Honestly, you will learn in this game of life, there is only a small percentage of people who truly have your best interest at heart. Another thing you will learn is that the only person who would truly look out for you through thick and thin is YOURSELF! I refused to be labeled by other’s standards and in the process I not only learned to accept myself but I was also inspired to make a movement for myself as well. A movement in which I identify myself as being undefined. I no longer live by other’s standards and I no longer entertain anyone else’s opinion on me and the things that I do unless I feel it is beneficial for me. Self-reflection has taught me to love myself unconditionally no matter what! 

Photographer: William Britton

Most importantly, self-reflection has taught me that I am NOT perfect and like everyone else, I am a work in progress. Finally putting your foot down and not submitting to being what society wants or feels you should be is a BIG step. You will most likely be misunderstood and even hated but if by me staying true to myself is what will trigger hate in others, who needs the love? All in all, it is up to the individual to figure out if being free from society’s standards is worth it to themselves or not. Will you lose yourself or will you be undefined?